"Say something cheerful..."

I started this blog along time ago. I originally thought "maybe I can make a difference" with the written word and started writing (infrequently) about things that apparently are difficult for people to see and do "The Right Thing."

Yeah, I know. Not enough time in the day to nail 'em all and certainly not an uplifting line of writing. And of course, I am occasionally just wrong. Hell, sometimes I don't even want to come back here to read and write.

Reprieve

Early this year, Kalina was born. She's cute (but luckily doesn't know it yet), curious (and luckily isn't walking on her own yet) and very friendly (good for making friends on airplanes and in airports even when she's not feeling her best.)

Her first two teeth have started their slow, painful accent to their semi-permanently location, having cleared the gums at last. Despite this discomfort, Kalina is cheerful, occasionally chatty (albeit loud) and well-adjusted for the calcium-migration she is currently experiencing.

Plus, I think she's finally figured out that he daddy loves her tiny hugs.

Letting Go

I recently was confronted with a recurring paradox. While I tried to ignore this paradox for years now, I finally "popped" and "took out" a friend.

At issue is the increasing "radicalization" of the religious believers. A friend (granted not a close friend) was off on a subtile but public "I hate Muslims and you should to" while pretending that Christianity and his faith required him to sow his hatred in public places.

The paradoxes (and there are a plethora involved) is primary the forgetful nature of the neo-Christians these days; primarily with the 2nd commandant in the New Testament (paraphrased):

Love your brother as you would love yourself.

Funny how the New Testament gives two fundamental commandments to the faithful in times of peace but the Old Testament is used to inspire cultural and religious intolerance and violence. (I'll leave the posting about these and other cultural paradoxes for another time.)

Initially I ignored his posting because, as an American, he has the right to express himself and I, as an American, have the right to ignore his ignorant, hateful .... self. So I did..for about 20 minutes.

As I continued scrolling through other posts via "a popular social network's" news feed and reading news online, I could see the same themes surfacing... a non-so-subtile, "Christian America is at war with Muslims." I guess I saw one post too many and I went back, grinding and gnashing my teeth...

Usually, I am passive, even purposefully timid when addressing other people's belief systems. I feel it is the utmost of evil to (try to) steal away a faith which makes someone's life understandable and bearable (even if I believe it's patently false.) I believe this is what "good people should do".

But, as I age, I see this is why our world and our species is in such sad shape:

Good people stand still, taking no action.

This concept leaves the world open to the most nefarious deeds, played out in plain sight and rationalized/spun to make it palatable for public consumption, acquiescence and ultimately revisionistic history.

I have been thinking about this and related notions for more 20 years and increasingly so since September 11th. I believe I am (basically) a "good" person but something has recently changed and, that early morning, I felt emotionally compelled into action.

In the public forum, I posted a response from the bile of offense, using the phrase "fake Christians", and layout a definition of "hate mongers" and possibly evening using the word "ignorant." I don't clearly remember. I don't particularly want to either.

I was livid. I was direct. I posted the response and then prompted remove the offending friend from my contact list, stating I didn't want to hear from him and his kind ever again.

I should be clear I am not Muslim, Jewish or Christian (any more). So, my outrage and response was not about defending Muslims or their faith; Muslims can do that themselves. It was about the current American "fad"/trend of hate mongering.

Muslims and Christians and Jews all share a common problem - a small set of truly ignorant people spoiling the name, image, philosophies and peace of the group as a whole.

In retrospect, it was an emotional response (Bravo for me having an emotion; too bad it was probably wasted energy.) While I do not regret my action, I do regret the "drive-by posting". So, when he posted/emailed his "what the hell?!" and asserting that, because I've never "worn a uniform in defense of my country, I wasn't worthy to speak about the subject of being at war with Muslims", I knew I owed him a direct explanation for my post and one apology for leaving the discussion without allowing him to respond.

I also knew it was the last time I would communicate with him.

My email was long and I did get into a little trouble with the wife for delay our departure for some errands that day so I could respond. It felt it was important to respond "in the moment." I know that, as time passes and my blood cools, I often revert to my passive, easy going nature as a "good person should". I didn't want to let this go. I couldn't afford to let this go any more.

I explained to him that his public behavior endangers my daughter. You see, I have a beautiful baby girl and, while she is my third child, she is the first to actually be born. The raw emotions of my history can be overwhelming at times.

While "my friend" first claimed that he wasn't being hateful, he did go on to say he was in fact (very loosely paraphrasing) 'at war with 'people who called "god" by a different name.' He of course couched this under the September 11th and Muslim mosque media events of the moment.

God, please! I hope the rest of the America and The World is showing a considerably more intellect than this.

I explained that his public hate mongering behavior fuels the going "culture wars" (or should that be "multinational corporation wars"...) between "Those Like Us" and "Those Not Like Us". I explained that, taken to the next level, he and his "Christian" friends would force me to raise my daughter in a world where, if she chooses the 'wrong religion', she would be put in harm's way for "choosing the name of god incorrectly." By "in harm's way", I mean murdered for the name of "god".

Oddly enough, he seemed to want to be a religious leader of men but is fairly ignorant of his own faith. Most people are. I'm not a religious or history scholar but I do pay attention and increasingly so. As I recall, the three primary religions of Judaism, Islam and Christianity share a common, tangled history. Thus, "god" by an other name...

Blasphemy? No, just distant history.

Anyone using fear and/or hate as a means of inspiring action is a terrorist. Not limited to leaders of nations and 'rich kids' hiding in desert caves, this also includes ignorant, arm-chair chair "generals" and "soldiers of god" wanting to be important, even if only for a destructive moment.

I have spent a fair amount of my 20s "trying to see American Culture" (I didn't have any real hobbies.) Its hard to do from the inside of a culture but I did manage to get a foothold of understanding. From the outside and (more importantly) as I start to care what nations and corporations are doing to my and my family's world and future, I feel sad for the ongoing global radicalization that is currently taking place; sad that it delivers a clear and present danger to, not just Americans, but the entire world; sad that we, as a species are still fighting wars for profit and murdering for the names of our mythical "god."

I put these deepest fears for the safety of my only child and her future into this response to "my friend." And then, I let him go.

Then the last paradox struck me: at least for that day, that moment, I had become a radicalized.